The Primrose, July 2010
I will be adding my usual (meaning unusual) take on Be All further along, but I would first like to share something that was new to me, and possibly will be to you as well.
My friend Georgia lives in Iowa (I know, but just go with it). For those who are geographically challenged, to find Iowa, just go West on either I-88 or I-80 and cross over the really big river. You can’t miss it. You will know you are there because everyone will be driving 5 MPH under the posted speed limit.
Anyway, I met Georgia in 2008 when we both attended Be All for the first time. Georgia was generally rather quiet that year (except of course for that Tequila incident in the lobby bar of the hotel), and even now she makes lame excuses to avoid going out on the dance floor. However, give the girl a guitar and the music takes over (witness the impromptu jam session in the lobby bar at Be All this year). But there is more to Georgia than just Tequila and guitars.
Recently I received a very formal invitation from Georgia. It was beautifully printed and had the look of a wedding invitation. The front of the invitation read “And now for something completely different . . . .” Inside, the formal script read:
“On Saturday July 3, 2010 Jeff and Barb wish to acquaint you with Jeff's entire self, including the transgender person widely known as Georgia.
“Trannies hardly ever come out. Undoubtedly this will be a unique event. Please join us to celebrate the union of Jeff's Spirit, to offer friendship and support and to answer your questions on a topic completely different.
“A keg of Dark Ale will be tapped no later than 1:00 p.m. Lite American Lager and wine will be available, of course. J&G's grill prowess will be tested. Children are welcome in the discretion of their parents. Resolve any doubt in favor of attendance.”
[Please note: Knowing that the offer of alcohol and food to those of us in the Chicagoland area might overtax the highways and bridges between here and Iowa, I elected to delete Jeff and Barb’s surname and their address from the above text.]
I must admit to being totally blown away! Most of us go to great lengths to keep our neighbors and friends unaware of our trans selves. But Georgia (with the help of a willing spouse) is going the opposite direction. Instead of pushing her “straight” and trans friends apart, she is pulling them together. And, she is doing it with formal invitations! Very, very classy! Brava!
I know that most of us do not feel that we are in a position to come out to the world as Georgia is doing. But, perhaps next year a few more of our trans sisters and brothers will follow her example. And then a few more the year after that. In time, these actions, along with other outreach and education activities, just might take us to the point where no one has to even think about whether or not to be out as a trans person.
Thank you Georgia!
*****
And that brings us to Be All. As I write this, it has been 10 days since the 2010 Be All wrapped up. There have been countless messages communicated through the Be All group about the excellent work done by the organizers and the hotel staff. Photos are being shared by the official event photographers as well as by many individuals, and I suspect that the July version of The Primrose will be/is full of words and pictures that describe and show what a great event it was.
It was indeed a wonderful event. But rather than rehash the same stories, let me take this opportunity to tell you how Be All was different for me this year. No, not just because I actually went to some seminars (that’s right, I managed to miss all of them last year). It was different this year because I was different this year.
My first Be All was 2008. That year I checked in on Thursday and stayed through Sunday. It was too short. In 2009, I checked in on Tuesday. This was better, but it still seemed to be a bit short, especially in terms of time to spend catching up with special friends. So, this year I arranged for some “pre-Be All” activities. As a result, my Be All started the Friday before the official start on the following Tuesday.
As happened last year, my spouse and my daughter scheduled a vacation of their own to coincide with Be All week. This year they arranged to rent a house on the beach in North Carolina. Early in the morning on the Friday before Be All, they left for their two-day drive to the East Coast. I was saddened by their departure, but I was also very excited about the week that was about to unfold.
As a regular reader of my literary drivel, you know that I frequently take a single event and write an entire column by detailing the many little odd and (occasionally) humorous tidbits from said event. What began that Friday was a series of events, any one of which might have made an entire column by itself. Since my both my Editor and my Publisher have these strange notions that The Primrose should not be completely devoted to my deathless prose, I am unable to give you great detail about all of these events. Besides, I had to devote the space in this paragraph to tell you why I could not give more space to other things, so that is less space I have available. Oops. I did it again. Before I get completely silly with this, here is a very condensed description of the noteworthy events that began that Friday after the departure of my little family.
Friday Evening – Sarah and I checked into a hotel on the Miracle Mile where we joined up with
my friend Sharon from Baltimore. Our first stop, was Hamburger Mary’s. Traffic delays (I love driving into Chicago on Friday afternoon) caused us to be too late to have dinner at that point, so we had a drink and moved upstairs to Mary’s Attic for a performance of Lady X presented by Hell in a Handbag Productions. One of the great things about this venue is that half of the room is taken up with a bar. So the play was accompanied by both spirits and appetizers. Following the show, we went downstairs to eat. There were probably spirits involved there too, but my memory starts to get a bit cloudy then. I seem to recall getting a cab outside Hamburger Mary’s, but after that I draw a blank.
Saturday Morning/Afternoon – The three of us went forth for manicures and pedicures after a bit of breakfast. Sarah and I had both planned to do either gel or acrylic nails, but we each experienced language difficulties and opted for regular manicure and polish. We were then off for shopping on Michigan Avenue. After a visit to Bloomingdales, lunch became a necessity, so we stopped into Frankie’s Scaloppine for some delicious Italian food (and a glass of wine). Next it was on to some serious, but affordable, shopping at Filene’s Basement (which was on the upper floor) and then the trendy (and very busy) H&M. By mid-afternoon, we were exhausted (or perhaps it was just me), so we retrieved our bags and the car from the hotel, and headed for the suburbs. Sharon and Sarah checked into the Doubletree (Be All hotel), and I headed for home. The plan was to take a little nap, prep for the evening, and go out to dinner. The time was about 4:00 PM.
Saturday Evening – I woke up from my nap just before 9:00 PM. Egad! By the time I got ready, returned to the hotel, repeated my profound apologies in person to Sharon and Sarah, got back in the car and drove to the nearby Yorktown mall, it was about 10:00. Since it was too late for a nice sit-down dinner, we headed over to Rock Bottom Brewery where appetizers are available late, and are half-price after 10:00. After consuming copious amounts of appetizers, we headed off to Temptations to do a bit of dancing. The crowd at Temps was a bit thin, but there were enough people so that there were perhaps a dozen on the dance floor for some songs. Unfortunately, after an hour or so, the DJ went off into her own world of rap music, seemingly oblivious to the fact that she had driven all the dancers off the floor. When it appeared that “good” music was done for the evening (no offense to lovers of rap music), we decided to call it a night.
Sunday Morning/Afternoon - We started with an excellent Sunday brunch at the Redstone Grill in Oakbrook Terrace. Personally, I find that bottomless Mimosas are an excellent way to start the day! Add the wonderful food and a completely delightful server, and you just know you are in heaven. After brunch we went grocery shopping for the party that was to be main event for the evening. The balance of the afternoon was spent on party prep at my house. Sharon was the Executive Chef. Sarah assisted wherever possible. I think I was in charge of alcohol and napping. Late in the day we were joined by my friend Erica from the Twin Cities area. She was in charge of looking fabulous and entertaining Juan (don’t ask).
Sunday Evening - The party was fairly small, but I think everyone had a good time. In addiThe official drink for the evening was the Cosmopolitan. It felt really good to have my friends at my home, sipping drinks, eating good food, and just enjoying our time together.
Monday Morning/Afternoon - In spite of the wonderful job that Sarah, Rebecca and others did in late-night cleanup, there was still quite a bit of cleaning and tidying up to be done the next morning. After that was done, I had to pack so that I could move into the Doubletree for the duration. Unlike previous years, I did not take everything femme that I own. Of course I still ended up taking enough clothes for a month. Two large and two small suitcases later, I got myself ready and it was off to the hotel.
Monday Evening – Erica, Sharon, Sarah and I went out for a wonderful meal at Capital Grille. Apart from the excellent food, wine, service and setting, you have to love a place that assists you with your napkin by giving you white if you are wearing something light colored, and black if you are wearing something dark. Very nice.
Be All officially got started the next day, and I will not begin to try and describe all that went on. However, I did tell you that I would explain why this Be All was different for me. Certainly the great weekend activities that I described above made this Be All new and different. But the things that made it really different for me were more personal. The first had to do with stamina.
In previous years, I was ready, willing and able to party late every night without a problem (OK, so I didn’t go to seminars). This year, I went to bed early a couple nights, including the night of the big Dr. Z party, and I took naps several times during the week. Now it is true that I had hurt my shoulder a few weeks earlier, and that I had been taking muscle relaxers and pain killers. Nevertheless, I see my overall party stamina being reduced from past years. Could it be age? Nah, must be the drugs.
The second factor was (and is) even more personal. I missed my spouse. Sure I missed her last year, but apparently there was a critical point somewhere between the 5 days we were apart last year and the 10 days this year. Yep, I missed her.
I expect that things will be different next year too. Just what Be All will look like for me, I have no idea. I do know that Be All is a great opportunity to get together with old friends and new, and to be happy and comfortable in my femme self for a prolonged period of time. So it might be different, and I might be different, but I will be looking forward to it!
*****
Hugs,Greer
*****Thoughts? Comments? Suggestions? Please send to me at greercd@hotmail.com
My friend Georgia lives in Iowa (I know, but just go with it). For those who are geographically challenged, to find Iowa, just go West on either I-88 or I-80 and cross over the really big river. You can’t miss it. You will know you are there because everyone will be driving 5 MPH under the posted speed limit.
Anyway, I met Georgia in 2008 when we both attended Be All for the first time. Georgia was generally rather quiet that year (except of course for that Tequila incident in the lobby bar of the hotel), and even now she makes lame excuses to avoid going out on the dance floor. However, give the girl a guitar and the music takes over (witness the impromptu jam session in the lobby bar at Be All this year). But there is more to Georgia than just Tequila and guitars.
Recently I received a very formal invitation from Georgia. It was beautifully printed and had the look of a wedding invitation. The front of the invitation read “And now for something completely different . . . .” Inside, the formal script read:
“On Saturday July 3, 2010 Jeff and Barb wish to acquaint you with Jeff's entire self, including the transgender person widely known as Georgia.
“Trannies hardly ever come out. Undoubtedly this will be a unique event. Please join us to celebrate the union of Jeff's Spirit, to offer friendship and support and to answer your questions on a topic completely different.
“A keg of Dark Ale will be tapped no later than 1:00 p.m. Lite American Lager and wine will be available, of course. J&G's grill prowess will be tested. Children are welcome in the discretion of their parents. Resolve any doubt in favor of attendance.”
[Please note: Knowing that the offer of alcohol and food to those of us in the Chicagoland area might overtax the highways and bridges between here and Iowa, I elected to delete Jeff and Barb’s surname and their address from the above text.]
I must admit to being totally blown away! Most of us go to great lengths to keep our neighbors and friends unaware of our trans selves. But Georgia (with the help of a willing spouse) is going the opposite direction. Instead of pushing her “straight” and trans friends apart, she is pulling them together. And, she is doing it with formal invitations! Very, very classy! Brava!
I know that most of us do not feel that we are in a position to come out to the world as Georgia is doing. But, perhaps next year a few more of our trans sisters and brothers will follow her example. And then a few more the year after that. In time, these actions, along with other outreach and education activities, just might take us to the point where no one has to even think about whether or not to be out as a trans person.
Thank you Georgia!
*****
And that brings us to Be All. As I write this, it has been 10 days since the 2010 Be All wrapped up. There have been countless messages communicated through the Be All group about the excellent work done by the organizers and the hotel staff. Photos are being shared by the official event photographers as well as by many individuals, and I suspect that the July version of The Primrose will be/is full of words and pictures that describe and show what a great event it was.
It was indeed a wonderful event. But rather than rehash the same stories, let me take this opportunity to tell you how Be All was different for me this year. No, not just because I actually went to some seminars (that’s right, I managed to miss all of them last year). It was different this year because I was different this year.
My first Be All was 2008. That year I checked in on Thursday and stayed through Sunday. It was too short. In 2009, I checked in on Tuesday. This was better, but it still seemed to be a bit short, especially in terms of time to spend catching up with special friends. So, this year I arranged for some “pre-Be All” activities. As a result, my Be All started the Friday before the official start on the following Tuesday.
As happened last year, my spouse and my daughter scheduled a vacation of their own to coincide with Be All week. This year they arranged to rent a house on the beach in North Carolina. Early in the morning on the Friday before Be All, they left for their two-day drive to the East Coast. I was saddened by their departure, but I was also very excited about the week that was about to unfold.
As a regular reader of my literary drivel, you know that I frequently take a single event and write an entire column by detailing the many little odd and (occasionally) humorous tidbits from said event. What began that Friday was a series of events, any one of which might have made an entire column by itself. Since my both my Editor and my Publisher have these strange notions that The Primrose should not be completely devoted to my deathless prose, I am unable to give you great detail about all of these events. Besides, I had to devote the space in this paragraph to tell you why I could not give more space to other things, so that is less space I have available. Oops. I did it again. Before I get completely silly with this, here is a very condensed description of the noteworthy events that began that Friday after the departure of my little family.
Friday Evening – Sarah and I checked into a hotel on the Miracle Mile where we joined up with
my friend Sharon from Baltimore. Our first stop, was Hamburger Mary’s. Traffic delays (I love driving into Chicago on Friday afternoon) caused us to be too late to have dinner at that point, so we had a drink and moved upstairs to Mary’s Attic for a performance of Lady X presented by Hell in a Handbag Productions. One of the great things about this venue is that half of the room is taken up with a bar. So the play was accompanied by both spirits and appetizers. Following the show, we went downstairs to eat. There were probably spirits involved there too, but my memory starts to get a bit cloudy then. I seem to recall getting a cab outside Hamburger Mary’s, but after that I draw a blank.
Saturday Morning/Afternoon – The three of us went forth for manicures and pedicures after a bit of breakfast. Sarah and I had both planned to do either gel or acrylic nails, but we each experienced language difficulties and opted for regular manicure and polish. We were then off for shopping on Michigan Avenue. After a visit to Bloomingdales, lunch became a necessity, so we stopped into Frankie’s Scaloppine for some delicious Italian food (and a glass of wine). Next it was on to some serious, but affordable, shopping at Filene’s Basement (which was on the upper floor) and then the trendy (and very busy) H&M. By mid-afternoon, we were exhausted (or perhaps it was just me), so we retrieved our bags and the car from the hotel, and headed for the suburbs. Sharon and Sarah checked into the Doubletree (Be All hotel), and I headed for home. The plan was to take a little nap, prep for the evening, and go out to dinner. The time was about 4:00 PM.
Saturday Evening – I woke up from my nap just before 9:00 PM. Egad! By the time I got ready, returned to the hotel, repeated my profound apologies in person to Sharon and Sarah, got back in the car and drove to the nearby Yorktown mall, it was about 10:00. Since it was too late for a nice sit-down dinner, we headed over to Rock Bottom Brewery where appetizers are available late, and are half-price after 10:00. After consuming copious amounts of appetizers, we headed off to Temptations to do a bit of dancing. The crowd at Temps was a bit thin, but there were enough people so that there were perhaps a dozen on the dance floor for some songs. Unfortunately, after an hour or so, the DJ went off into her own world of rap music, seemingly oblivious to the fact that she had driven all the dancers off the floor. When it appeared that “good” music was done for the evening (no offense to lovers of rap music), we decided to call it a night.Sunday Morning/Afternoon - We started with an excellent Sunday brunch at the Redstone Grill in Oakbrook Terrace. Personally, I find that bottomless Mimosas are an excellent way to start the day! Add the wonderful food and a completely delightful server, and you just know you are in heaven. After brunch we went grocery shopping for the party that was to be main event for the evening. The balance of the afternoon was spent on party prep at my house. Sharon was the Executive Chef. Sarah assisted wherever possible. I think I was in charge of alcohol and napping. Late in the day we were joined by my friend Erica from the Twin Cities area. She was in charge of looking fabulous and entertaining Juan (don’t ask).
Sunday Evening - The party was fairly small, but I think everyone had a good time. In addiThe official drink for the evening was the Cosmopolitan. It felt really good to have my friends at my home, sipping drinks, eating good food, and just enjoying our time together.
Monday Morning/Afternoon - In spite of the wonderful job that Sarah, Rebecca and others did in late-night cleanup, there was still quite a bit of cleaning and tidying up to be done the next morning. After that was done, I had to pack so that I could move into the Doubletree for the duration. Unlike previous years, I did not take everything femme that I own. Of course I still ended up taking enough clothes for a month. Two large and two small suitcases later, I got myself ready and it was off to the hotel.
Monday Evening – Erica, Sharon, Sarah and I went out for a wonderful meal at Capital Grille. Apart from the excellent food, wine, service and setting, you have to love a place that assists you with your napkin by giving you white if you are wearing something light colored, and black if you are wearing something dark. Very nice.Be All officially got started the next day, and I will not begin to try and describe all that went on. However, I did tell you that I would explain why this Be All was different for me. Certainly the great weekend activities that I described above made this Be All new and different. But the things that made it really different for me were more personal. The first had to do with stamina.
In previous years, I was ready, willing and able to party late every night without a problem (OK, so I didn’t go to seminars). This year, I went to bed early a couple nights, including the night of the big Dr. Z party, and I took naps several times during the week. Now it is true that I had hurt my shoulder a few weeks earlier, and that I had been taking muscle relaxers and pain killers. Nevertheless, I see my overall party stamina being reduced from past years. Could it be age? Nah, must be the drugs.
The second factor was (and is) even more personal. I missed my spouse. Sure I missed her last year, but apparently there was a critical point somewhere between the 5 days we were apart last year and the 10 days this year. Yep, I missed her.
I expect that things will be different next year too. Just what Be All will look like for me, I have no idea. I do know that Be All is a great opportunity to get together with old friends and new, and to be happy and comfortable in my femme self for a prolonged period of time. So it might be different, and I might be different, but I will be looking forward to it!
*****
Hugs,Greer
*****Thoughts? Comments? Suggestions? Please send to me at greercd@hotmail.com
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